Boat Race

[3carriers]

[P]Southwest Airlines and American Airlines decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River. Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race. On the big day, Southwest won by a mile.[BR]Afterwards, the American team became very depressed and discouraged. The American management decided that a reason for the crushing defeat had to be found, A Measurement Team made up of senior management was formed. They would investigate and recommend appropriate action. They concluded that Southwest had eight people rowing and one person steering, while American had one person rowing and eight people steering. So American management hired a consulting company and paid them incredible amounts of money. They advised that too many people were steering the boat and not enough people were rowing.[BR]To prevent losing to Southwest next year, the rowing team''s management structure was completely reorganized. There would be four steering supervisors, three area steering superintendents and one assistant superintendent steering manager. American also implemented a new performance system that would give the one rower a greater incentive to work harder.[BR]The Rowing Team QuAAlity First Program had meetings, dinners and included free pens for the rower. We will give the rower empowerment and enrichments through this quality program, management said.[BR]Next year. Southwest won by two miles.[BR]Humiliated, American management laid off the rower for poor performance, halted development of a new canoe, sold the paddles, and cancelled all capital investments for the new equipment. Then they gave a High Performance award to the steering management and distributed the money they saved as bonuses to the senior executives.

 

[WingNaPrayer]

Stop!.....STOP!....I'm gonna pee my pants!!

 

[Buck]

[blockquote]
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On 1/19/2003 5:46:46 AM WingNaPrayer wrote:

Stop!.....STOP!....I'm gonna pee my pants!! [IMG src="http://www.martweb.net/images/laugh.gif"] [IMG src="http://www.martweb.net/images/laugh.gif"]
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[/blockquote]
Do you need taxpayer funding for that?

 

[A/C FIXER]

Stop, Stop, You're killing me, I haven't laughed so hard in a loooooong time.

 

[Buck]

[blockquote]
----------------
On 1/19/2003 5:46:46 AM WingNaPrayer wrote:

Stop!.....STOP!....I'm gonna pee my pants!! [IMG src="http://www.martweb.net/images/laugh.gif"] [IMG src="http://www.martweb.net/images/laugh.gif"]
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[/blockquote]
Whats the matter WNP something besides the cat got your tongue?

 

[RowUnderDCA]

yes, yes, this gem has been around for awhile. I'm sure it's very insightful about AA's management, but it makes a mockery out of rowing and/or canoeing. As a rower, I always cringe when I read it.

First, you don't row a canoe, you paddle it.

Second, no-one person steers a canoe without also paddling... you steer with a paddle.

Third, the person who steers a rowing shell is the coxswain.

Fourth, you sweep row with one oar per rower (you scull with two sculls per sculler, usually without a coxswain)

Actually, at least one thing is accurate.... a crappy eight-man crew will try to scapegoat a single rower after a crappy race.

 

[grndproxwarning]

[blockquote]
----------------
On 1/18/2003 1006 PM 3carriers wrote:


Southwest Airlines and American Airlines decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River. Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race. On the big day, Southwest won by a mile.
Afterwards, the American team became very depressed and discouraged. The American management decided that a reason for the crushing defeat had to be found, A "Measurement Team" made up of senior management was formed. They would investigate and recommend appropriate action. They concluded that Southwest had eight people rowing and one person steering, while American had one person rowing and eight people steering. So American management hired a consulting company and paid them incredible amounts of money. They advised that too many people were steering the boat and not enough people were rowing.
To prevent losing to Southwest next year, the rowing team's management structure was completely reorganized. There would be four steering supervisors, three area steering superintendents and one assistant superintendent steering manager. American also implemented a new performance system that would give the one rower a greater incentive to work harder.
The "Rowing Team QuAAlity First Program" had meetings, dinners and included free pens for the rower. "We will give the rower empowerment and enrichments through this quality program," management said.
Next year. Southwest won by two miles.
Humiliated, American management laid off the rower for poor performance, halted development of a new canoe, sold the paddles, and cancelled all capital investments for the new equipment. Then they gave a "High Performance" award to the steering management and distributed the money they saved as bonuses to the senior executives.
[/P]
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[/blockquote]
Oh that has to hurt.I wonder you stole that off Don"s desk
Sounds like some of the networking gigs in DFW A few years
ago..Been there, done that, bought the tee shirt.

 

[Oliver Stone''s Apprentice]

I heard that one in college, except that it was about Boeing and McDonnell-Douglas (hence, the Missouri River...).