Fantasy Financial metrics

jcw

Veteran
Aug 12, 2004
2,053
2,683
All,

Let's compile a list of fake or made up financial statistics that we should ask the airline standards body and GAAP folks to mandate airlines to report so some won't have to struggle with the analysis.

Maybe we can have deltamatics lead the way and interface it to ACARS so we can get the info real time on every flight

Give it your best shot
 
and yet, DL has consistently posted superior moonthumbs per seat gallon for every quarter since 1972.
 
AA hasn't.
 
what you and the other AA fanboys here fail to grasp is that with an ever-increasing negative fleet age and an inverted coffee cup to engine cycle ratio trans-Pacific yields and time-adjusted FRASM's will eventually equalize with seasonal variations in headwind drag velocity and an increasingly favorable reduction in the pro-balsamized lending rates which AA's creditors are enjoying artificially.
 
it comes straight from the financial statement.
 
DL was made on the eighth day and was blessed exceptionally by the Almighty; DL is without sin but came to this world to deliver us from subpar non-Atlanta based legacies.  Richard Anderson excretes nuggets of solid gold.
 
these are FACTS.
 
it is not a personal attack to say you'd be less of a schmuck if you'd ever worked for DL. AA is has reason to be worried for the sole fact that it is not DL and consistently and SEVERELY has not been DL for nearly 320 quarters - that the new management has done nothing to change this should very much concern AA's employees and investors and don't think that Wall Street hasn't noticed it as well.
 
attitudinal-adjusted polls of high-revenue FF's consistently demonstrate that the most lucrative transcontinental passengers care far more about the amount and profitability of the cargo in the holds beneath them than they do amenities, seating options, or quality of service - but, hey, if AA wants to continue flying highly profitable people back and forth across North America it's in their right to do so, it will cost them dearly and I am highly confident that AA's Q4 financial results will justify my opinion here.
 
DL is winning in W. Kansas.
 
DL does not lose money, it does not know how.
 
DL completed a transwarp PNR systems integration in record time, Dougie simply doesn't care to, and probably lacks sufficient knowledge in multi-dimensional airline booking software co-crossovers to do so.
 
DL met and surpassed UA's reverse load-modified SHASM torque values in all top-performing markets - alphabetically - and put WN's bobbledrop transmogrified maintenance expense per square footage of carpeting to shame.
 
can AA say the same?
 
DL wins again.
 
Fact: if you paint a red widget on the tail, your planes will fly faster on less fuel. Also your passengers will pay more for their ticket and they won't mind the shittier food.
 
ChockJockey said:
 
what you and the other AA fanboys here fail to grasp is that with an ever-increasing negative fleet age and an inverted coffee cup to engine cycle ratio trans-Pacific yields and time-adjusted FRASM's will eventually equalize with seasonal variations in headwind drag velocity and an increasingly favorable reduction in the pro-balsamized lending rates which AA's creditors are enjoying artificially.
 
 
Richard Anderson has created the Benjamin Button of airline fleets. They are old but only growing younger with age. In another 10 years, the 764s will be 787s. 
 
These are FACTS.
 
ChockJockey said:
attitudinal-adjusted polls of high-revenue FF's consistently demonstrate that the most lucrative transcontinental passengers care far more about the amount and profitability of the cargo in the holds beneath them than they do amenities, seating options, or quality of service - but, hey, if AA wants to continue flying highly profitable people back and forth across North America it's in their right to do so, it will cost them dearly and I am highly confident that AA's Q4 financial results will justify my opinion here.
 
!!! (lol)
 
  • Thread Starter
  • Thread starter
  • #5
These are wonderful

The only thing missing - let's see the omnidirectional hub coefficient
 
DL is the leading airline featuring female flight attendants in red wrap dresses to LAX.
 
DL is the Chicago market leader among ALL airlines that don't begin with the letter A, U, or S.
 
NYC was an isolated backwater before DL's growth at LGA and JFK put that ramshackle outpost on the map.
 
im_a_delta_classic_thong.jpg
 
ChockJockey said:
and yet, DL has consistently posted superior moonthumbs per seat gallon for every quarter since 1972.
 
AA hasn't.
 
what you and the other AA fanboys here fail to grasp is that with an ever-increasing negative fleet age and an inverted coffee cup to engine cycle ratio trans-Pacific yields and time-adjusted FRASM's will eventually equalize with seasonal variations in headwind drag velocity and an increasingly favorable reduction in the pro-balsamized lending rates which AA's creditors are enjoying artificially.
 
it comes straight from the financial statement.
 
DL was made on the eighth day and was blessed exceptionally by the Almighty; DL is without sin but came to this world to deliver us from subpar non-Atlanta based legacies.  Richard Anderson excretes nuggets of solid gold.
 
these are FACTS.
 
it is not a personal attack to say you'd be less of a schmuck if you'd ever worked for DL. AA is has reason to be worried for the sole fact that it is not DL and consistently and SEVERELY has not been DL for nearly 320 quarters - that the new management has done nothing to change this should very much concern AA's employees and investors and don't think that Wall Street hasn't noticed it as well.
 
attitudinal-adjusted polls of high-revenue FF's consistently demonstrate that the most lucrative transcontinental passengers care far more about the amount and profitability of the cargo in the holds beneath them than they do amenities, seating options, or quality of service - but, hey, if AA wants to continue flying highly profitable people back and forth across North America it's in their right to do so, it will cost them dearly and I am highly confident that AA's Q4 financial results will justify my opinion here.
 
DL is winning in W. Kansas.
 
DL does not lose money, it does not know how.
 
DL completed a transwarp PNR systems integration in record time, Dougie simply doesn't care to, and probably lacks sufficient knowledge in multi-dimensional airline booking software co-crossovers to do so.
 
DL met and surpassed UA's reverse load-modified SHASM torque values in all top-performing markets - alphabetically - and put WN's bobbledrop transmogrified maintenance expense per square footage of carpeting to shame.
 
can AA say the same?
 
DL wins again.
 
[sharedmedia=core:attachments:10308]
 
FrugalFlyerv2.0 said:
Post #2 has got to be the best! post! ever!
AMEN!  However, I'm surprised no one posted one of the most important standard measures--the MDSARSM--Mountain Dews served per available revenue seat mile.  Come to think of it, no one mentioned the Big Red statistic either though it is not as indicative of impending AA doom as the MDSARSM.
 
ChockJockey said:
and yet, DL has consistently posted superior moonthumbs per seat gallon for every quarter since 1972.
 
AA hasn't.
 
what you and the other AA fanboys here fail to grasp is that with an ever-increasing negative fleet age and an inverted coffee cup to engine cycle ratio trans-Pacific yields and time-adjusted FRASM's will eventually equalize with seasonal variations in headwind drag velocity and an increasingly favorable reduction in the pro-balsamized lending rates which AA's creditors are enjoying artificially.
 
it comes straight from the financial statement.
 
DL was made on the eighth day and was blessed exceptionally by the Almighty; DL is without sin but came to this world to deliver us from subpar non-Atlanta based legacies.  Richard Anderson excretes nuggets of solid gold.
 
these are FACTS.
 
it is not a personal attack to say you'd be less of a schmuck if you'd ever worked for DL. AA is has reason to be worried for the sole fact that it is not DL and consistently and SEVERELY has not been DL for nearly 320 quarters - that the new management has done nothing to change this should very much concern AA's employees and investors and don't think that Wall Street hasn't noticed it as well.
 
attitudinal-adjusted polls of high-revenue FF's consistently demonstrate that the most lucrative transcontinental passengers care far more about the amount and profitability of the cargo in the holds beneath them than they do amenities, seating options, or quality of service - but, hey, if AA wants to continue flying highly profitable people back and forth across North America it's in their right to do so, it will cost them dearly and I am highly confident that AA's Q4 financial results will justify my opinion here.
 
DL is winning in W. Kansas.
 
DL does not lose money, it does not know how.
 
DL completed a transwarp PNR systems integration in record time, Dougie simply doesn't care to, and probably lacks sufficient knowledge in multi-dimensional airline booking software co-crossovers to do so.
 
DL met and surpassed UA's reverse load-modified SHASM torque values in all top-performing markets - alphabetically - and put WN's bobbledrop transmogrified maintenance expense per square footage of carpeting to shame.
 
can AA say the same?
 
DL wins again.
ChockJockey wins. 
 
glenn  is that WT crying there  or is he overjoyed at seeing this thread??? 
 
ominidirectional hib coefficient...  may be build up STL MCI  and TUL!!!!    they'll run intl flights out of those cities
 
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