Your Morning Smile

[helicopper]

Little David was in his 4th grade class when the teacher asked the
children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers
came up -- fireman, policeman, salesman, doctor, lawyer, etc.

Little David was being uncharacteristically quiet, so the teacher asked
him about his father.

"My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his
clothes in front of other men and they put money in his underwear.
Sometimes, if the offer is really good, he will go home with some guy
and make love with him for money. "

The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other
children to work on some exercises and took little David aside to ask him,
"Is that really true about your father?"

"No," said David, "He works for the Liberal Party, but I was too
embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids."

 

[graunch1]

Geez I thought you were going to say he worked for TC

 

[Bohica]

In the light of the recent terrorist bombings in Spain, France has upgraded it's terrorist alert from "run" to "hide." The two higher alerts are "surrender" and "collaboration."

 

[Elvis]

Is that like the French army guns on E Bay ,never fired & only dropped once

 

[Bohica]

A major multinational corporation wished to open a Canadian branch and were looking for someone to head up the operation. They'd interviewed dozens of candidates for the post and had narrowed them down to three - one from Vancouver, one from Toronto and one from Stephenville. In an attempt to choose just one of them, they decided to ask all three the same question and allow each one twenty four hours to come up with the answer.

The question was: A man and a woman are in bed, nude. The woman is lying on her side facing away from the man. The man is lying on his side, facing the woman's back. What is the man's name?

Twenty four hours later the three were brought in to give their answers. The Vancouverite stated flatly, "My answer is, there is no answer."

The Torontonian allowed "There is no way to determine the answer using the information we were given."

The lad from Stephenville said he'd narrowed the man's name down to two, Willie Nailer or Willie Turner.

 

[Bohica]

Two older gentlemen were pushing their shopping carts around Loblaw's when they collided.

"Oops," said the first, "I'm sorry. I wasn't looking where I was going. I'm looking for my wife."

"That's a coincidence," says the second, "I'm looking for my wife also. I haven't seen her for a bit. I'm getting a little worried actually."

"Well," says the first, "maybe I can help you find her. What does she look like?"

"She's tall, has red hair and blue eyes, nice boobs and a tight little bum. What does yours look like?"

"Never mind," came the answer, "let's look for yours."