'Twas the Night before Christmas
And all through the company
The workers were scrambling
To hang on to their money
While management snuggled up
With their millions in bed
While visions of more stock options
Danced in their heads
Every holiday brings
Another "Sincerely Dave" letter
How on the backs of the employees
This company can be better
"Our costs are too high"
His letter foretells
Oh how I long for stale cookies and old cheese
From Wolfe and Gangwel
My home is for sale
And my children's clothes are in tatters
While in Crystal City
There was uproarious laughter
"Did we ruin their Christmas?
I hope so'" said Glass
"And after the New Year
Will be the unions' last gasp"
When what to my wondering
Eyes should appear
But a miniature airplane
Called an RJ, our savior
With a little old driver
Whose retirement was stolen away
He can't afford to retire
So he's driving this sleigh
More rapid than eagles
These RJ's they came
Dave and Jerry whistled and shouted
And called them by name
"Now Cleveland, now Portland
Now Allentown, Now Erie
Come Pittsburgh, come Charlotte
Oh what the hell
Put'em in Philly"
To the top of the world
To the top of the wall
Stash away, stash away
Before the stock price falls
As dry leaves that before
A wild RJ fly
When management meets with an obstacle
"We need more concessions" is their battle cry
Dave's eyes how they twinkle
With every contract he breaks
Retirements, airbus checks
Christmas is great
With a wink of his eye
And a twist of his head
Another lie was coming
The workers were filled with dread
He was greedy and a liar
But so jolly through it all
I guess millions will do that
You know, a house in the caribbean and all
And giving the finger
To the emploees at U
He jumped in his RJ
All shiny and new
To his team gave a whistle
And away they all flew
To St. Maarten, St. Kitts
And St. Thomas too
But I heard him exclaim
As U shrunk down in size
Merry Christmas to all
Thanks for believing my lies
And all through the company
The workers were scrambling
To hang on to their money
While management snuggled up
With their millions in bed
While visions of more stock options
Danced in their heads
Every holiday brings
Another "Sincerely Dave" letter
How on the backs of the employees
This company can be better
"Our costs are too high"
His letter foretells
Oh how I long for stale cookies and old cheese
From Wolfe and Gangwel
My home is for sale
And my children's clothes are in tatters
While in Crystal City
There was uproarious laughter
"Did we ruin their Christmas?
I hope so'" said Glass
"And after the New Year
Will be the unions' last gasp"
When what to my wondering
Eyes should appear
But a miniature airplane
Called an RJ, our savior
With a little old driver
Whose retirement was stolen away
He can't afford to retire
So he's driving this sleigh
More rapid than eagles
These RJ's they came
Dave and Jerry whistled and shouted
And called them by name
"Now Cleveland, now Portland
Now Allentown, Now Erie
Come Pittsburgh, come Charlotte
Oh what the hell
Put'em in Philly"
To the top of the world
To the top of the wall
Stash away, stash away
Before the stock price falls
As dry leaves that before
A wild RJ fly
When management meets with an obstacle
"We need more concessions" is their battle cry
Dave's eyes how they twinkle
With every contract he breaks
Retirements, airbus checks
Christmas is great
With a wink of his eye
And a twist of his head
Another lie was coming
The workers were filled with dread
He was greedy and a liar
But so jolly through it all
I guess millions will do that
You know, a house in the caribbean and all
And giving the finger
To the emploees at U
He jumped in his RJ
All shiny and new
To his team gave a whistle
And away they all flew
To St. Maarten, St. Kitts
And St. Thomas too
But I heard him exclaim
As U shrunk down in size
Merry Christmas to all
Thanks for believing my lies
