A little humor

[delldude]

On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new husband and asked for $20.00 for their first lovemaking encounter.

In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed.
This scenario was repeated each time they made Love, for more than 40 years, with him thinking that it was a Cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that She needed.

Arriving home around noon one day, she was Surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state.
During the next few minutes, he explained that His employer was going through a process of corporate Downsizing, and he had been let go.


It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find Another position that paid anywhere near what He'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.


Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which Showed more than forty years of steady deposits and interest totaling Nearly $1 million. Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued By the bank which was worth over $2 million, And informed him that they Were one of the largest depositors in the bank.


She explained that for more than Three decades she had 'charged' him for sex, These holdings had multiplied and these were the Results of her savings and investments.

Faced with evidence of cash and investments Worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could Barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out,.

.

.

.

.


'If I'd had any idea what you were doing,
I would have given you all my business!'


That's when she shot him!

You know, sometimes, men just don't know when
To keep their mouths shut!

B) BAHHHHHHHH !

CU in court

 

[xUT]

LAMO!


Korean 'GANGSTERS'.. WTF?

B) xUT

 

[Glenn Quagmire]

Breaking news. Korean news identifies Southwest pilots in latest mishap.

View attachment 9860

 

[delldude]

Breaking news. Korean news identifies Southwest pilots in latest mishap.

View attachment 9860

Fire your writer.

 

[traderjake]

 

[delldude]

Has anyone seen the Bear?

 

[xUT]

Tried to kill my pizza post.
May Bad..

 

[delldude]

NEW YORK (BHN) - As yet more photos of Anthony Weiner's penis surface, the ex-Congressman is seeking to distance himself from the scandal.
"I'm not about to deny that's my Johnson, it is, but I do deny sending photos of it to these women," Weiner told reporters Thursday morning. "Like most men, my penis definitely has a mind of its own, but I absolutely do not condone it sending photos of itself to anyone."
To back up his claim, Weiner showed reporters a photo purported to be his penis operating a camera in front of the mirror.
While denying any wrongdoing connected to the lewd photos, Weiner did admit to sending "a few spirited texts" to several women during a time of marital discord.

 

[traderjake]

 

[traderjake]

 

[Knotbuyinit]

Land of No Pubes !!

 

[xUT]

Men Teaching Classes for Women at
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTRE​

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
By December 29, 2013​

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM .​

Class 1
Up in Winter, Down in Summer - How to Adjust a Thermostat
Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hrs beginning at 7:00 PM..​

Class 2
Which Takes More Energy - Putting the Toilet Seat Down, or Bitching About It for 3 Hours?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.​

Class 3
Is It Possible To Drive Past a Wal-Mart Without Stopping?--Group Debate.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.​

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between a Purse and a Suitcase-- Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.​

Class 5
Curling Irons--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Bathroom Cabinet?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
At 7:00 PM​

Class 6
How to Ask Questions During Commercials and Be Quiet During the Program
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM​

Class 7
Can a Bath Be Taken Without 14 Different Kinds of Soaps and Shampoos?
Open Forum ..
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.​

Class 8
Health Watch--They Make Medicine for PMS - USE IT!
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.​

Class 9
I Was Wrong and He Was Right!--Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.​

Class 10
How to Parallel Park In Less Than 20 Minutes Without an Insurance Claim.
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.​

Class 11​

Learning to Live--How to Apply Brakes Without Throwing Passengers Through the Windshield.
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined​

Class 12
How to Shop by Yourself.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.​

Send this to all your guy friends for the best chuckle of their day...
And to all your gal friends who have a sense of humour

 

[xUT]

Ammo is getting scarce!

This morning I lucked out and was able to buy two boxes of ammo.​

I placed the boxes on the front seat and headed back home, but stopped at a gas station where a drop-dead gorgeous blonde in a short skirt was filling up her car at the next pump.​

She glanced at the two boxes of ammo, bent over and leaned in my passenger window, and said in a sexy voice, "I'm a big believer in barter, old fella. Would you be interested in trading sex for ammo?"​

I thought for a few seconds and asked,​

"What kind of ammo 'ya got?"​

😛

 

[delldude]

.

😀

That cracks me up....especially the way he flows into the room.

 

[xUT]

https://www.youtube....h?v=ldQrapQ4d0Y


😛