How ironic St. Nic day is soon.
Hypothetical conversation between Parker and Prater
Ring sound, Parker calling Prater. (Top Gun theme sounds on the head of the Airline Pilots Associations phone.)
“Captain Praterâ€
“Hi Captain Prater, Doug Parker here.â€
“Hello Mr Parkerâ€
“You can call me Doug by the way, how are you John.â€
“You can call me Captain Prater.â€
“Ok Captain Prater. Lets get to the point , you have the list and I’ve got a merger possibility that will make this world a better place for airline travelers and you will save ALPA. Of course I am going to net millions of dollars on this. I need the list presented after the first of the year, so we do not disrupt holiday travel when we announce a transaction with United and Virgin America. Virgin will get assets only, but Tilton and I will clean up on the merger and you‘ll get your ALPA back. We need to use the Nic award to get rid of the old bastard Usairways pilots. It seems though, a lot like Pan Am, TWA, Braniff, Ozark and Eastern, no ALPA pilots want the excess baggage associated with their union brothers I have flying for me. Your Union leadership helped here, ideas Please.â€
Captain Prater adjusts his wig and says, “no problem. I have been through this many times before, we will make them the tip of the spear and mention them in the Flying The Line Book. Excuse me Doug, Santa Claus,Rudolph, tinker bell and Peter Pan are on the line, they fly and we need dues paying members.â€
“Call you after the first of the year, Ba buy Captain Prater, My driver is waitingâ€
“Must be nice to have your own driver, Doug.â€
“I’ll explain later Capt Prater, I am not held up to the standards you pilots are on driving privileges.â€
Click sound.
Slam noise.