I love old farmer stories,
A big city lawyer was out pheasant hunting. He shot a pheasant that landed in an old farmers field. He jumped the fence to get the bird just as the old farmer came over the hill on his tractor. He drove up to the hunter and asked what he was doing on his property? The hunter explained that he was a big city lawyer, an important man, who came here pheasant hunting and the bird that he shot came down in the farmers field.
The farmer said that that would make it his pheasant as it is his field. The lawyer states again that he is a very important man from the city and he should overlook the fact that he is trespassing on the farmer field.
So to settle this the farmer says that we will have a little contest. We'll take turns kicking each other in sets of three and the first one to give up can have the bird. As it is my land, I'll go first says the farmer.
The lawyer sees that he is an old man and thinks that little harm can come from this so he agrees. The farmer halls of and kicks him in the privates which puts the lawyer to the ground. Than he kicks him hard in the belly, and lastly, a swift kick to the head which has the lawyer seeing stars. The lawyer finally makes it back to his feet and says to the old farmer "okay it's my turn". The farmers says " I give up you can have the bird.