A little humor

[delldude]

Relaxing at the cabin.....
 

 

[SharoninSAT]

Why women use purses...
 
http://youtu.be/kQ0gLlSdoHM

 

[xUT]

View attachment 10231
😛

 

[SharoninSAT]

.
😀                                           

 

[xUT]

View attachment 10281
😛

 

[delldude]

A guy walked into a crowded bar, waving his 1911 Colt .45 with a



7-round magazine plus one in the chamber and yelled,




 




"Who in here has been screwing my wife?"




 




A voice from the back of the bar yelled back, "You need more ammo."




 




Just another example of why you need to own high-capacity firearms.






















































































 









 

 

[xUT]

[SIZE=14pt]Are you a Liberal, a Conservative, or a Redneck?[/SIZE]


Here is a little test that will help you decide.

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two
small children. Suddenly, an Islamic terrorist with a huge knife comes
around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities,
raises the knife, and charges at you.

You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You
have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What do you do?

[SIZE=14pt]Liberal[/SIZE]'s Answer

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think? What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife
out of his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does
this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1 ?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a
happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing!

I need to discuss with some friends over a latte and try to come
to a consensus.


[SIZE=14pt]Conservative[/SIZE]'s Answer:

[SIZE=18pt]BANG![/SIZE]


[SIZE=14pt]Redneck's Answer:[/SIZE]

BANG! BANG! BANG ! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click....
(sounds of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click ..

Daughter: "Nice going, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or
Hollow Points?"

Son: "You got him, Pop! Can I shoot the next one?"

Wife: "You are NOT taking that to the taxidermist!"
------------------------------------------------------
😛

 

[xUT]

[SIZE=12pt]Some darn fool tried stealing my identity. Guess he didn't get what he'd bargained for and sent me a card in the mail today.

In it he wrote: [/SIZE]

[SIZE=12pt]Dear Chum,[/SIZE]
[SIZE=12pt]Please accept my humblest of apologies. I am sorry I stole your identity.

First I had a phone installed under your name. The dang thing wouldn't stop ringing! Bill collectors, lawyers, and your cousin Billy called collect from the State Pen every day! [/SIZE]

[SIZE=12pt]I applied for credit cards but instead of receiving cards I received balance due notices threatening to take me to court if not paid in full within 7 days. I've had to move twice already! [/SIZE]

[SIZE=12pt]I came home from a night out on the town last week and found your wife and kids sprawled out all over the house. My house is trashed, they've eaten all the food, and they refuse to leave! [/SIZE]

[SIZE=12pt]I promise to turn my life around and never commit another crime for as long as I live if you will come pick up your family. [/SIZE]


[SIZE=12pt]I replied:  Nope![/SIZE]
 
[SIZE=12pt]😛[/SIZE]

 

[La Li Lu Le Lo]

I thought this was a bit funny.
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGN5xaQkFk0
 
By the way.... Bob Ross.

 

[La Li Lu Le Lo]

One more
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zn7-fVtT16k 
 

Einstein

 

[La Li Lu Le Lo]

I don't know if this is considered humorous but I thought it would be interesting to post anyway. Talk about turning a crowd around.
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0_e-TUhRbrI

 

[La Li Lu Le Lo]

 



























































































A guy walked into a crowded bar, waving his 1911 Colt .45 with a



7-round magazine plus one in the chamber and yelled,




 




"Who in here has been screwing my wife?"




 




A voice from the back of the bar yelled back, "You need more ammo."




 




Just another example of why you need to own high-capacity firearms.




















































































 

 
 


I am putting that one in the joke holster.

 

[delldude]

 

[Dog Wonder]

Dogs have all the fun.

 

[La Li Lu Le Lo]

Dogs have all the fun.

Well, they are easy to amuse....... some more than others. You know what I mean?