PAWOB Award - Weeks of 5/7 to 5/20/2007

Jan 9, 2004
950
2
Pittsburgh PA
Hey, Hey, Hey!

It's the PRINCE of PAWOBs!

Now I'm gonna sing a song for you,

And then I'll award a prize or two.

We'll have some fun now, with Doug and all his gang,

Cutting flights from Pittsburgh, and sabotage within!

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah! Gonna have a good time!


Hey, Hey, Hey!

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah. We're still out of sliced limes!

Okay, now thst I've finished my song, I have two big winners for the PAWOB award this week. The first is his royal heinie, the Duke of DUI, Doug Parker. DoUgIe balked on his promise not to cut anymore flights from Pittsburgh and DID IT ANYWAY. It's not because traffic is down, but rather because he thinks the planes need to be moved to higher volume markets.

Really? Where is that, DoUgIe? PHL? CLT? PHX? LAS? You don't have enough planes? Awwwww! Then stop sending the ones you have back. At any rate, King Bonehead is still sure he's way, and I mean WAYYYY smarter than everyone else, so as the stock price continues to fall and investors suddenly become divestors I hope he considers that I personally recind any and all offers to show your face in Pittsburgh ever again. You can send Scottie Boy, because I've actually seen him respond to problems instead of sweeping them under the rug. His response time might be slower, but at least he's showing a modicum of effort.

Remember, DoUgIe: You are to stay AWAY from Pittsburgh. You can go to the following cities listed below.

Rome, Phoenix (sorry, guys), Kabul, Bagdad, the City of Brass (which you'll have to Google) and finally Shakleton in Antarctica, which isn't really a city, but you'll do the least amount of damage if you go there and stay a while.

Okay, on to newer stuff. SHARES continues to be irritating, and this week your old pal the PRINCE discovered a neat message while trying to decode an Air Canada codeshare flight number.

"This function is available in SABRE only"

Wow! No $#!+, Sherlock. A function that are new RES system can't perform but can tell you what RES system can. Genius! That's so helpful in so many ways......not. Thank you, IT!

Okay, the recap: DoUgIe and SHARES win awards for the last two weeks. Yep...that's about it.

Will I be back next week? Do you really care? Well, I can answer the first one. The answer is a resounding NO. I have decided that 1) My time is a bit more valuable elsewhere as of recent, and 2) this award should be a bit more sporadic in nature in order to really point out fun flaws with the US product. So instead, I'm just going to do the award whenever I feel like doing it. More fun for me at any rate.

The trophy is also a no go. I called a trophy shop and told the guy there what I wanted. He laughed, then he said they don't do custom work and he had no idea where I could get a silver turd. After hanging up with Trophy Guy, I wondered if I could do it myself and realized that a trophy like that would be the opposite in effort to the awardee that deserves such an award. So, I simply flushed the toilet, washed my hands (which is good hygiene, by the way) and put back my propane torch and the silver cup which was to be the victim of a cruel demise.

Well, that should cover it. Good luck to all of you (except DoUgIe), and remember to be safe out there in all that you do (again, with the same exemption as before).
 
The trophy is also a no go. I called a trophy shop and told the guy there what I wanted. He laughed, then he said they don't do custom work and he had no idea where I could get a silver turd. After hanging up with Trophy Guy, I wondered if I could do it myself and realized that a trophy like that would be the opposite in effort to the awardee that deserves such an award. So, I simply flushed the toilet, washed my hands (which is good hygiene, by the way) and put back my propane torch and the silver cup which was to be the victim of a cruel demise.

In the military, our aircraft maintenance branch had a trophy of a man with his head stuck up his buttocks. If a shop screwed up, the NCOIC of the offending shop would be awarded the trophy until another shop screwed up. The trophy was to be presented proudly on the desk of the NCOIC with a small note of explanation. Anyhoo, if you look on the Web, there should be a trophy shop that specializes in such things.
 
In the military, our aircraft maintenance branch had a trophy of a man with his head stuck up his buttocks. If a shop screwed up, the NCOIC of the offending shop would be awarded the trophy until another shop screwed up. The trophy was to be presented proudly on the desk of the NCOIC with a small note of explanation. Anyhoo, if you look on the Web, there should be a trophy shop that specializes in such things.
Won't work Barbee...at least in the military..we could actaully offer some proper "award" for utter failure...

In the corporate world?=It's a suitcase stuffed with millions :lol:
 
Prince -

I think I have the award winner for you.

Picture it.....the day of the Board of Directors meeting in PHL and Scott is to return to PHX on F251 PHLPHX. Of course, since Scott, Doug and the Board Members are flying, the all points bulletines fly to "ensure these flights depart on time." (Total bull fecies in my book. We should concern ourselves with the PAYING customers flights and not sporadically target flights because Board Members and Executives are flying)

Now cut to F251, operating PHLPHX - the flight inbound is held up due to ATC causing a delay on F251. The inside does an excellent job of getting customers on.off the airplane and the flight pushes off the gate - meeting the ground time objective (shock!)

Aircraft arrives in PHX and guess what???? NO BAGS WERE BOARDED! Now where to place the blame....the overworked and disgruntled rampers that are making a point (doubtful) or the overzealous Manager who determines that since Scott is on board, they better not take any additional delay and orders the flight to pushback without the bags. (Much more likely).

Unbelievable.....
 
Prince -

Now cut to F251, operating PHLPHX - the flight inbound is held up due to ATC causing a delay on F251. The inside does an excellent job of getting customers on.off the airplane and the flight pushes off the gate - meeting the ground time objective (shock!)

Aircraft arrives in PHX and guess what???? NO BAGS WERE BOARDED! Now where to place the blame....the overworked and disgruntled rampers that are making a point (doubtful) or the overzealous Manager who determines that since Scott is on board, they better not take any additional delay and orders the flight to pushback without the bags. (Much more likely).

Unbelievable.....

Too funny. Hoped Scott checked a bag.
 
I hope one of the agents in PHX would be proactive enough to let the passengers know that the president of the airline was in the airport when they head down to baggage claim.

Isn't it interesting? We've already marginalized DoUgIe and we haven't even hit 10 posts in this thread.

"Two there should be. No more, no less. One to embody power, the other to crave it." - Darth Bane
 
Aircraft arrives in PHX and guess what???? NO BAGS WERE BOARDED! Now where to place the blame....the overworked and disgruntled rampers that are making a point (doubtful) or the overzealous Manager who determines that since Scott is on board, they better not take any additional delay and orders the flight to pushback without the bags. (Much more likely).

Unbelievable.....


:shock: I feel sorry for the customers and the PHX baggage agents, but that is funny. BTW, what were the weight and balance numbers for the flight?
 
Prince -

I think I have the award winner for you.

Picture it.....the day of the Board of Directors meeting in PHL and Scott is to return to PHX on F251 PHLPHX. Of course, since Scott, Doug and the Board Members are flying, the all points bulletines fly to "ensure these flights depart on time." (Total bull fecies in my book. We should concern ourselves with the PAYING customers flights and not sporadically target flights because Board Members and Executives are flying)

Now cut to F251, operating PHLPHX - the flight inbound is held up due to ATC causing a delay on F251. The inside does an excellent job of getting customers on.off the airplane and the flight pushes off the gate - meeting the ground time objective (shock!)

Aircraft arrives in PHX and guess what???? NO BAGS WERE BOARDED! Now where to place the blame....the overworked and disgruntled rampers that are making a point (doubtful) or the overzealous Manager who determines that since Scott is on board, they better not take any additional delay and orders the flight to pushback without the bags. (Much more likely).

Unbelievable.....

Another on time departure :up: :up: :up: