A little humor

[delldude]

 

[xUT]

"What's the difference between a Porsche and a porcupine?The pricks are on the outside of the porcupine!"

 

[delldude]

 

[tech2101]

A little mechanic/pilot humor.

Foul language.

 

[777 fixer]

I laughed so hard I cried!

 

[Glenn Quagmire]

Funny, but foul language.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4fxNoGKZhW8&feature=youtube_gdata_player

 

[delldude]

 

[southwind]

Don't make 'em like they use to !

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9-k5J4RxQdE&feature=player_detailpage[youtube]

 

[Knotbuyinit]

You're going to have to elect him so you can see what's in his tax returns

 

[SharoninSAT]

Health Advice!​

When you drink vodka over ice, it can give you kidney failure.
When you drink rum over ice, it can give you liver failure.
When you drink whiskey over ice, it can give you heart problems.
When you drink gin over ice, it can give you brain problems.

Apparently, ice is really bad for you.
Warn all your friends.​

😀​

 

[xUT]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aFafmM4Bw-8&feature=related

 

[SharoninSAT]

.
Now that's funny! 😀

 

[xUT]

View attachment 9585
😛

 

[xUT]

[font=Times New Roman"]the teacher asked the class to use the word 'fascinate' in a sentence.

Molly put up her hand and said, 'My family went to my granddad's farm, [/font][font=Times New Roman"] [/font][font=Times New Roman"]and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.'

The teacher said, 'That was good, but I wanted you to use the word [/font][font=Times New Roman"]'fascinate, not fascinating'.

Sally raised her hand. She said, 'My family went to see RockCity and [/font][font=Times New Roman"] [/font][font=Times New Roman"]I was 'fascinated.' The teacher said, 'Well, that was good Sally, but I [/font][font=Times New Roman"] [/font][font=Times New Roman"]wanted you to use the word 'fascinate.'

Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because she had[/font][font=Times New Roman"] [/font][font=Times New Roman"]been burned by Little Johnny before.

She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word [/font][font=Times New Roman"] [/font][font=Times New Roman"]'fascinate', so she called on him.

Johnny said, 'My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits [/font][font=Times New Roman"]are so big she can only fasten eight.'

The teacher sat down and cried. 😛[/font]

 

[xUT]

[font="Arial""]You're a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you. So what do you do?

Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot four Politicians.

Of course, this means you will be sent to prison where you will get three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating, air conditioning and all the health care you need!

Need new teeth? No problem. Need glasses? That's great. Need a new hip, knees, kidney, lungs or heart? They're all covered.

As an added bonus, your kids can come and visit you as often as they do now.

And who will be paying for all of this? It's the same government that just told you that you they cannot afford for you to go into a home.

And you can get rid of 4 useless politicians while you are at it.

Plus, because you are a prisoner, you don't have to pay any income taxes anymore. Is this a great [/font][font="Arial""]c[/font][font="Arial""]ountry or what?[/font]
[font="Arial""]😛[/font]