Hmm,no Post About The Employee Bonus Plan Eff 7/1?

[Severed-N-Happy]

Let the fun begin!

Comments???

Performance Incentive Program

In a special edition of US Airways Today, Executive Vice President and Chief Human Resources Officer Jerry Glass issued a letter to all active employees announcing the “All Together. On Time.†Monthly Employee Incentive Program.

On July 1, US Airways and US Airways Express will launch the program, which is designed to reward employees for performance-related goals in two key areas: on-time arrivals (S:14) and baggage handling.

Glass said “focusing on the job at hand and giving 100 percent to ensure the continued safety and improved reliability of our service†will bring the company closer to monthly reaching and maintaining our operational performance goals.

In return, employees can receive a cash award of up to $100 per month, paid in addition to normal wages, for achieving these goals. The incentive program will run July 1 through Dec. 31, 2005.

Glass said the program also will help build the momentum of the “All Together. On Time.†initiative. “In our customers’ eyes, arriving on time with luggage is the foundation of US Airways’ success. By consistently providing this service, we will keep our customers coming back,†said Glass.

Details regarding the employee performance incentive program, including a helpful Q&A, can be found by clicking “All Together. On Time.†from the home page and then scrolling down. Also look for the special editions of today’s US Airways Today

 

[PITbull]

Bob,

Your post made me fall off my chair laughing.

The funny thing is about luggage, they had lost Tom Ridge's luggage yesterday going from PHL to PIT. PHL never even boarded it when the Ex Governor did. He finally got it today by a Manager who tracked it down and hand delivered it herself.

 

[PITbull]

Bob,

You should "patent" that post... I still can't stop laughing.

 

[jimcfs]

Those who need more S.H.I.T than they can stand can call Mr Glass directly at 1-800-GET-S.H.I.T for a personal executive level S.H.I.T session.

[post="278775"][/post]​

Bob, you forgot one important thing here... How can any US employee get S.H.I.T. from someone at CCY who doesn't give a S.H.I.T.?

 

[singh4us]

Bob,

Thanks, that is really funny!!

The original S.H.I.T. memo is below; but I like Bob's spin!!

...


Memo: Special High Intensity Training (S.H.I.T.)

In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T.). We are trying to give employees more S.H.I.T. than anyone else.

If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T. on the job, please see your manager. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list, and our managers are especially skilled at seeing that you get all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.

Employees who don't take their S.H.I.T. will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T.). Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T. S.H.I.T.). Since our managers took S.H.I.T. before they were promoted, they don't have to do S.H.I.T. anymore as they are all full of S.H.I.T. already.

If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be interested in a job training others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST (B.U.L.L. S.H.I.T.). Those who are full of B.U.L.L. S.H.I.T. will get the S.H.I.T. jobs, and can apply for promotion to DIRECTOR OF INTENSITY PROGRAMMING (D.I.P. S.H.I.T.).

If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TRAINING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T. S.H.I.T.).

Thank you,

BOSS IN GENERAL
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING

(B.I.G. S.H.I.T.)

 

[robbedagain]

now that is very funny! as Sheriff Roscoe P Coltrane would say in the dukes of hazzard " I love It! I Love IT I Love IT!!!!

 

[flyin2low]

That S.H.I.T. memo thing has been around for at least 10 years........ :angry:

 

[Schatzee]

:mf_boff: :mf_boff: :mf_boff:

 

[Severed-N-Happy]

This topic, humorous as it sequed, never addressed the original content.
Ok..now Discuss!!~~~